It seems there is
hidden rule here: whenever the marriages is high then expect the
divorce to be high too.
You wonder the
number of young men and women getting married here in Somaliland.
Almost everyday you see a number of cars decorated and a lot of
people celebrating for the engagement of a couple getting married.
The wedding halls are fully booked and always busy with different
ceremonies of engagement, wedding and anniversaries.
Go to those
wedding halls to see how many are getting married in a particular
number of days, week or a month. Go to the hospitals to see how many
women are delivering their babies. Visit the pediatric doctors to
see those parents with the babies coming for treatment. You can see
the number is really high. There is someone I know, a young man of
his 20s married to a three wives and have 15 kids. It is one example
of many in the country.
Besides this, the
divorce rate is dramatically high. Sometimes you think people get
married only to divorce each other. Go to the court and other places
to see how many are getting divorces. I know a woman of her 30s
divorced more than 8 times with no children at all. It is only one
example but if you look closely then you will find tens of women
like this, may be more.
The problem is
that the couples are getting married in their early 20s or may be
younger. We all know in that age the education is limited, the
resources are not enough and the understanding is somehow difficult.
The point view of an old person would be different even if he/she
get married in those ages.
Most of the modern
marriages are based on excitement and lust while it is supposed to
be based on love and reality. In a very little time then excitement
is gone and the lust is fulfilled then nothing is remaining but
problems that have no solutions but the last one, a divorce. How
many young girls dropped from their schools because of a marriage
and get divorced in few years only to loose both education and
family.
In the cultural
point of view, Somali parents support the early marriage especially
for the girls. This is contributing to the fact that there is a lack
of education among women in this country. It is something nobody can
change at least in the near future since it is a cultural thing.
Some few women challenge the whole society and insister to finish
their education so that they will have a better future both for the
family and for the country.
In order to limit
the divorce we need to encourage the education and let the couples
get married when they are really ready to do so mentally, physically
and spiritually. We should let the society know the benefit of the
education and the damage of the early marriage to the little girls.
Young boys and
girls should learn the LOVE, should know how to run a family and how
to raise babies before they go for a marriage. We need to open new
schools for family awareness and problem solving sessions for the
couples. Some people lack a very small advice before they separate
for good.
