The African Star

An on-line publication for degree and certificate programs in journalism

Vol. 5 No. 1 2008

HUMOUR: Snooper encounters embarrassment before fiancé

University of Hargeisa journalism degree student, Abdilahi Ibrahim Nour, tried his luck on the sumo wrestler !

 In the past three weeks, rumor has been spreading like bush fire not only in the capital Hargeisa, but in the countryside too, that Snooper was training hard in order to participate in the 2010 London Olympics, with a view of wining a gold medal in sumo wrestling.

       Friends turned foes; Ali and Umar, although not officially declared, were behind the rumor. The duo's propaganda began sometime last week, after spotting me at Dooxa (Hargeisa Dry River) undergoing Sabaxaad training with renowned wrestlers from the countryside. Sabaxaad is a popular form of wrestling in Somaliland.

     The chaps spread stories everywhere, even to Khasab ku Marqaan, a popular khat-chewing joint where I spend the evenings chewing Bondaro, my favorite Khat, and indeed the cheapest in Hargeisa. Ali was heard by a colleague saying at the joint amid giggles: “How on earth Snooper, weighing less than fifty kilogrammes, could dream of challenging those huge Japanese sumo wrestlers”.

       But in fact I’m neither interested in participating in the forthcoming London Olympics nor a local one. The incident that forced me into training happened some two weeks ago after I encountered the worst form of humiliation- being wrestled in front of my fiance. The incident remains vividly fresh in my mind.

      On the material day, a Friday like any other bore no bad omen, I thought, little did I know that I would encounter the worst embarrassment of my life.  As is custom on Fridays, Fatuma, my wife-to-be, accompanies me for window shopping looking for her fancies.

  After strolling from one street to another all morning, the hour struck one o’clock, and my teeth started demanding their daily supply of Bondaro (a type of the narcotic Khat plant and popular in Hargeisa).  I heeded to their demand and went straight to the khat stalls just behind Farah Joome building. I decided to buy expensive stuff instead of the usual the cheap Bondaro and went for Daba-Musbaar, fearing Fatuma might know that I chew the cheap Bondaro.

   I paid, and a seller wrapped it in a bluish polythene bag. But no sooner had I taken the first step, than a powerful hand grabbed my small neck so strongly that I almost chocked to death. I instantly thought that perhaps, the owner of the hand might have been an ex-Kuli, construction site workers, because of its coarseness. I turned back quickly to see its owner and came face to face with huge fellow, bearing a number of scars on his face, and missing his fore teeth.

“What is wrong?” I shouted. “What the hell are you trying to do, you bloody thief? He growled, with particles of khat, those lucky to escape from being crushed by his remaining teeth, landing on my face. Before I could answer, he added “try your dirty tricks somewhere else” and grabbed the khat from thin hand. I shouted “I paid the money,” however, my argument fell on deaf ears. Since it was shameful being roughed up before my fiance, the adrenaline in my body was ordering me to charge at the chap. A violent argument ensued and finally, we decided to sort it out physically.

    The fellow was not only strong but fast. He grabbed my thin waist, pulled me to his direction and sent me flying behind him. I landed on my belly with thud, hands spread out, an embarrassed man. My mouth was full of sand and I had sustained bruises on my arms.

    I didn't mind being flung to the ground, but the worst was being embarrassed in front of my fiance. To add insult to injury, the women selling khat in the street opposite burst into a sudden laughter following the free-for-all scenario. I heard one of them saying in a rather high-pitched voice “way wadhe-e-e-e-n, he has been flung to the ground”. It was the worst embarrassment ever.

      I stood up and tried to defend myself before Fatuma, despite her witnessing the whole saga. “Eh you know, it was these high-heeled shoes which made me slip, otherwise I could have shown him dust” I told her, managing a smile. And as  I was leaving the scene, the women were still giggling.

   The next morning, I headed straight to Hargeisa dry river for wrestling training in order to revenge against the khat seller and restore my dignity.

  As friends turned enemies continue spreading the rumors, I’m still hunting for the chap. And if, in any case I spot him; I would hurriedly call Fatuma to watch how I would show him dust, since I was sure of myself this time round.